Commitment

Today is our 18th wedding anniversary. I can’t believe it’s been 18 years. The first 5 flew by. Newlyweds with few concerns. We were young. We were invincible. Free. Filled with joy. The second 5 we gave up our freedom with 3 children under 4, 2 of which were twins! A mentally and physically taxing endeavor for us both, to say the least. Axel’s hair filled with gray. Me. Well he didn’t see much of me because I was breastfeeding 24/7. Patience. That’s what comes to mind. He had a lot of that. Never once did he tell me to take the kids out of our bed, now a king size. Never once did he tell me to quit breastfeeding. Never once did he question my instincts as a mother. He observed. He came along for the ride. He cooked and cooked and cooked. The next 5 years were about survival, resilience, change. Me in my early to mid forties. Him stepping into his fifties. We both grew up immensely. We both learned the art of appreciation. We both went along for the ride. And now, we are in the midst of the next 5 year cycle, 3 years in. We have both pursued our passions these past 3 years. We have both observed our kids forming into young adults. We are both still in survival mode but more appreciative of what we have. We (I) get upset (I’m in my late 40s now so you may understand what I mean.) We seek to understand. We live. We hope. We dream. This year we will celebrate Axel’s oldest daughter, my step daughter’s marriage to the man she loves. A new beginning. A year for celebration. The 1 year in numerology. A new beginning. A celebration of commitment. Looking into the future, which is a precarious journey, 7 years from today, to our 25th anniversary, our youngest, the twins, will be 2 months from turning 18! I try to look forward to our time alone but I know it will difficult for us both when all the children are grown up. Such is the circle of life. It stops for no one. We can only live with gratitude for the present moment as we don’t know what the future holds. So today, I’m grateful to have my husband, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, til death do us part. Happy Anniversary to us both, we’ve come a long way. #marriage #commitment

Thoughts

thoughts